Will the Fingerprints Count?

Ethan and I received written notice of appointments to have biometrics done (fingerprinting) shortly afterI contacted USCIS to tell them that Ruth had married and moved out of our home.  Both our China case manager and our USCIS agent were surprised at this notice, and said we shouldn't go to the appointment.  We have to file ANOTHER Supplement 3 to our i800a, this time requesting an extension (our prints from the girls expire in January) AND including an addendum to our homestudy to show that Ruth has moved.  They said we will get our fingerprint appointment after that Supp3 is filed.

Well....the problem is that the written notice said in bold letters that our petition would be considered abandoned (and our case closed) if we didn't appear for the biometric appointment.  I honestly have no idea why they sent the notice when they did, but we were simply unwilling to risk it and ignore it.

So, today is my birthday.  It is also Isaac's birthday.  Did you know we share a birthday?  I spent the morning at the USCIS office being fingerprinted.  I have to say it seems a unique way to spend a birthday!  Will they count for anything?  Will we have to repeat them once our next form is approved?  Who knows?  But I will sleep better tonight knowing I didn't just ignore the letter that they mailed to our home!

I had so hoped to have our LOA by now so we could at least send Isaac our well wishes.  It is so hard to not be allowed to communicate with him, especially on his birthday.  He is eleven years old today. Will you help me wish him a happy birthday? I would totally love to see his puzzle (that will fund his plane ticket home) completed for his birthday! We're requesting a $5 donation for each piece of the puzzle. Sponsor one or a whole bunch! We'll put your name on the back of each sponsored piece then double glass frame it when completed. I think it will be very special to him to see all those names and know that the people behind them were wishing him well and hoping for his homecoming. 

Donations are tax deductible when sent through our family sponsorship link here http://reecesrainbow.org/63623/sponsorlanz-2

-- We aren't automatically notified when someone donates to it, so please comment below with how many pieces you sponsored and the name you'd like on it/them. Thank you! And Happy Birthday Isaac! Next year we will party in person!

Ramp News!

Today the guys came to begin work on the ramp.  There wasn't much actual work accomplished on it, but they did rethink the entire plan at our request.  The original plan had the ramp beginning at the door and going straight out ten feet to a five foot by five foot deck. It would then turn and go out another six feet to the driveway.  It was going to be a big deal noticeable thing and a huge change to the layout of the front yard.

My biggest concern about this plan was the potential of cutting off activities on the front porch.  We use it a lot.  Not only do the girls and I really enjoy swinging out there, but we've even had a couple of parties on the front porch.  I really want Isaac to be able to be a part of it all.

They have an alternative plan that I'm very excited about.  The way I understand it, the ramp will come out the front door onto a platform that goes down towards the swing.  Isaac would then be able to wheel about on the front porch.  There will be a section taken out of our porch railing to allow the platform to go out to a deck where his chair can turn.  The ramp will then run parallel to the front porch and down to the sidewalk.  It upsets the layout of the front yard less - well except for having to move all the bushes and the hostas in front of the house out a few feet.

They are hoping to get the posts set by next week.  I'm so excited!

I do not think that means what you think it means....

Today Abigail was a rascal.  She was IN MY FACE bossing me about everything.  I finally told her, "Abigail, you are starting to bug me!" 

She stopped, got this shocked look on her face, put her hand on her chest and asked, "ME?"

I replied, "Yes!  You!"

Abigail clapped and cheered "YAY!" very loudly.  What could I do but laugh?

Guest Post by Carrie Farrell

Today's post is by Carrie Farrell who has a great big heart for orphans.  This was a speech that Carrie gave in one of her school classes.  It seems very fitting for the month set aside for orphan awareness.  The theme was - "I believe." I asked for her permission to share it with you. 
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 I believe no child should age out of an orphanage without learning proper life skills. “There are over 143.5 million children orphaned worldwide  Fifty-five percent of these orphans are between the ages of twelve to seventeen." (*Guckenberger) These children usually phase out of the orphanage around the age of fourteen without any proper job training, and are left out on the streets. 

Today I am going to look at the following: 

• the background of orphans,
• why orphans need to learn proper life skills,
• and lastly the results of training orphans. 

 Believe it or not, being an orphan is usually a cyclical thing. Most of the time a young girl gets pregnant and cannot provide for the baby.  She sends her little boy to the orphanage, because she grew up in an orphanage and knows it’s a “safe” place. The child grows up in the orphanage and leaves at the age of fourteen. Has no ability to judge right from wrong and joins a gang. Before he knows it he is dealing drugs and getting young girls pregnant and the cycle starts all over again. 

Most foreign countries like China and Mexico allow children to age out at fourteen, meaning they put them out on the streets. In Mexico, the reasoning behind this is that the government no longer pays for the child’s education after the eighth grade. Countries like Bulgaria let the children choose to go to an older children’s home as early as seven, but they don’t have to stay there! With the illustrated story above about my hypothetical boy, one could say it was his choice to join the gang, but realistically he never grew up with a sense of right or wrong. 

Values are one of the many things that parents instill in the life of their child. In the orphanage it is the survival of the fittest, so you will use any means available to you to survive whether it is right or wrong. Just think if you went out into the world at the age of fourteen. Would you have been ready to combat the world, make good decisions, and provide for yourself? No.  But you would be better equipped than an orphan. Because you know right from wrong, have gone out in public, know where to seek affection, and have been taught basic social manners like how to look at someone when they speak to you.  An orphan has never had any of these basic lessons or opportunities.

 Now imagine if you were a phased out orphan. You likely would have, like anyone else, gravitated towards crime. What would the results be if we took in children who aged out of the system and taught them the basic skills needed in life, like making eye contact and going to the grocery store? We would see a reduction in crime and orphans, because the orphans would be better educated and find more worthwhile occupations, stopping the cycle. It would also reduce the amount of those on social welfare, which would help relieve the tax payer’s burden. Not only would it benefit those around them but also the 143 million children around the world. 

 I have three adopted sisters whose lives have been changed and rescued from the cycle. Imagine the difference if this happened to 143 million children. Imagine the radically different world we would live in, one in which crime rates were reduced. 

I, Carrie Farrell, believe that no child should age out of an orphanage without learning proper life skills. 

* Source: Reckless Faith by, Beth Guckenberger. She is a part of Back-To- Back Ministries originally from Mason, Ohio. The organization Back-to-Back has created a specific program to help children who have aged out of the system. They provide children with a home environment, education beyond the eighth grade (including college), life-skills, and love of Christ.

A Change in Plans

It seems our house has been hopping with activity since before Ruth's wedding.  So much so that I was anticipating a "relaxing weekend at home" which meant Ruth and Gerret were here opening their wedding gifts (joined by a crowd for whom I made dinner) and loading a moving truck with her things.  James and his girlfriend were coming in (from college) to visit too. Relaxing?  The gift opening and dinner part went well, and when I put the Little Princesses to bed on Friday night I assured them that we were going NOWHERE the following day.  The reality of Saturday was no where on my radar.

At seven in the morning my daughter, Hannah called to tell me that her water had broken, and she had signs of labor.   I have six other grandchildren, so this announcement might not have taken me by surprise except that this baby wasn't due for another five weeks!  I quickly dressed and began the three hour trip wondering what kind of "dirty lying rat" thoughts my little girls would have that day.  My intention was to return yet that evening.

As it turned out, Ethan took the Little Princesses to watch their nephews launch model rockets that day.  I guess they were fascinated and had a good time, AND it became apparent that at least Abigail is catching on to the whole concept of family.  She told my oldest daughter, Sarah, that Aaron (her husband) was a Baba but not HER Baba.  And she (Sarah) was a Mama, but not HER Mama.  Great concept.  Abigail then proceeded to tell her that HER Mama had driven off, and something about a sleeping baby.  Ouch at the driving off part!

Babies do what babies want to do, and this baby wanted to have our full attention for the entire day.  He finally made his appearance at 11:58 pm!  He was sent to the NICU as a precaution, but he is doing very well.

Ethan drove over the following day to meet the new family member.  I met him (and the Princesses) at the entrance to the hospital.  Abigail stopped and stared when she saw me, then began sobbing!  I quickly picked her up and she just clung to me, with both her arms and legs, and cried for a long time.

What was going through her little head?  Did she think I had left her forever?  Were there flashbacks of other times in her life when those she had become attached to had simply walked away?  We'll likely never know.  Adoption always comes with a loss.  She has lost so much in her little life.  I wish I could just kiss the boo boos to make them all better.  But some of those losses will stay with her forever.

I'm hoping the weekend is a memory that will serve her when I make the trip to China to bring Isaac home.  Sometimes Mama has to go, but Mama always comes back. 

Isaac Update ... just a small one

I got a note from our China case manager today and this is what she said, "Your dossier documents went to DC yesterday, so hopefully we’ll be sending your dossier (to China)  in two weeks!"

Aging Out

It used to be when one thought of adoption from China, they thought of healthy, baby girls.  Things have changed a lot over the years and it is now estimated that 90-98% of children abandoned have health needs.  When we were in China we experienced how difficult it was to even get a cab with a handicapped child.  No one wanted to pick us up when we had a wheelchair.  We did finally get one to stop, but the chair wouldn't fit in the trunk.  It ended up riding with us inside the cab on our feet! 

I wasn't prepared for the reality of how much the boys outnumbered the girls in the orphanage that we visited.  People seem to expect to adopt girls, so the fact that a child is a boy can be a "special need" in and of itself!

China's law specifies that a child must be adopted by their fourteenth birthday or they are no longer eligible.  There is a stigma that is lifelong for an orphan.  If they have a visible "handicap" it is even worse.  Often they cannot attend school or obtain employment.  Their future isn't bright.

There are many aging out orphans in China. What can you do?  If you cannot adopt them, pray for them.  Pray for their family to quickly find them!  These are five aging out children for whom DEFEND is advocating.  Do note that they are all boys.  Please pray for these kids!

Austin, 13 years

Tom, 13 years

Bobby, 13 years, nearly out of time

Daniel, 13 years old

Elijah, 13 years, nearly out of time

To learn more about any of these children visit Defend's Aging Out Page.